Truth…Beauty…Freedom…Love

I admit that I am not a risk taker. I made a lot of mistakes in the past and I certainly hate repeating them…I can be totally obsessive compulsive over things.I developed this sort of defense mechanism (psych 10???) so I won’t get hurt again by anything or anyone.Apparently it works for me.

However, there are still some things you can’t control…Some things just come unexpectedly. I never thought I’d feel like this again.It feels like I’m back to the old me…I’m being vulnerable again. I hated the idea that I’m preparing myself to get hurt again. It’s not like I’m saying that I won’t get hurt again. I mean…"Gimme a break!!!" I’m not a masochist…

It scares me that at this moment that I’m starting to feel such feelings again, I suddenly become capable of doing crazy stuff…Suddenly, I became an artist— I got the inspiration I lost so long ago…I did this art thing, it was really pathethic but that’s what I wanted to people to see. Now, I write again…I stopped writing about stuff happening to me because I thought nothing was really happening…Until now… What more can I do? Hmmm…I don’t wanna think again about…You don’t wanna know…haha…

Let’s just put it this way, I’m really happy right now…The timing may not be right, or the reason may not be worth it, but…who cares?! It’s not everyday that I feel like this…

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 18th, 2006 at 5:35 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.